Bad parenting

so adel is quite a feisty one since the day we brought him home. Dah la cepat bosan (kids with their short attention span, normal la kan?) susah tido, kuat marah, kuat mengeliat, kuat menggelupur, kuat (he seemed to have demonstrated his strength even before he was born- but think i'll write about that later) that we constantly have to come up with something to keep him satisfied.

Anyways, when he was about a month old, i started playing gangnam style each time i needed him to calm down a little. So bole la pegang with one hand and used the other utk mkan ke buat keje pape.

In the last couple of days, Alem rasanya dah penat memegang adel, so he started playing mario brothers on youtube for adel to watch. Guess what, that really got adel's attention. Must be the colors and the sound kot. So senang la sikit alem nak buat keje, nak masak ke apa... So since then, kalu nak buat pape, I'd do the same, main mario brothers, and g mandi ke, lipat baju ke apa2 ke.

This was last week when we thought mario brothers are fun and harmless 

Tp yesterday, rasa guiltyyyy sgt. I came home. Saw adel on his tummy, tangan crossing uncrossing, feet up in the air while watching mario brothers sampai he didnt even bother to turn and look at me when i got home. Normally, he'd turn and look whenever I opened the door, regardless of what he was doing. But yesterday, langsung tarak!

Even when I went down and said hi to his face pon he didnt really bother to look at me. Okla, he glanced a little then went back to his mario brothers. Geram pon ada, sedih pon ada...

This was yesterday, after saying hi for the upteenth time. Watching my almost 4-month-old enjoying mario brothers makes me feel like a really bad parent

Aaaaiiissssshhh, i really don't know what to do. If only i could play with him all day and not let him watch utube, honestly i would. But the demands of our modern life ni mmg very frustrating la....